无题～

本来应该在做着事情，但是思绪一直不能集中～头脑有太多的画面一直在重播～

昨晚的对话让我发现，原来男人都是看外表的～男人都喜欢漂亮的人，东西，或事物～

其实又何止是男人呢？所有的人都一样，每个人都喜欢漂亮的东西呀～

我知道他说话时无心的，可是心还是痛了一下～

原来我的外貌真的是上不了台面～哈哈～

我其实真的是一个笨蛋，一直在很努力的在达到别人的标准～

说什么减肥是为了健康，都是骗人的～

其实，我只是在努力达到别人对我的要求～

因为大家都不喜欢胖胖的人，那我就减肥吧～

但是，虽然瘦了很多，别人也觉得”是，你瘦了很多”， 后面还有一个但是，“你还不到标准，要加油哦，继续瘦下去”～

很累，真的觉得很累～

我一直跟自己说要坚强，我以为我真的成功了，我在很努力的表现不是自己的自己～

因为表现自己会让人觉得自己很不成熟，让人觉得自己很不懂事～

本来以为不提，不说，不讲，就没有人知道～

原来还是自己傻的可以，自己骗自己，原来大家都知道～哈哈～

我在很努力地面对大家了～我不知我能做的多好，但是我在尽全力了～

我觉得我快要得面部神经失调症～我不知道自己的面部表情如何，不过至少我是在努力的展现笑容～至于成不成功，就不在我的范围里面～

其实，一直在回想，只是让我觉得自己很笨～我真的很不想承认，但是为什么我就是这么傻？

她要回来了，其实我很感恩，这两个星期她不在这里，我才有时间好好思考～

其实，我是很不想理她的，无论任何理由～但是，我必须想到自己在教会的领袖责任～

我不可以这么自私，所以就算是表面也好，也要对她公平～

是很假，很虚伪，但是这是做人的道理～

其实，我也没想对她怎样，就只是不想面对她～但是这不可行，会让自己留下话柄～

所以，我会很努力，再次把自己伪装好，来面对人群～

其实·，我真的很想离开教会，但是我跟自己说，不可以这么任性，我还有很多教会的责任，不能说跑就跑～很想跑回家，但是，我不可以这么任性，我还有教书的责任～就算只是part-time，我也必须对他们负责任～有责任感是好还是不好？哈哈，笨蛋，现在你跑不掉了～

乱七八糟，没有次序，我想我也患上思绪失调症吧？！不知道自己到底说了什么～

如果，你正在看这篇文章，不要吓到，因为是我在发神经，其实没事的，所以不要担心～

我的结论是，我真的是一个超级大笨蛋～哈哈～

19句至理名言

1、如果发短信息给一个人，他一直不回，不要再发了。没有这么卑微的等待。

2、如果没有人陪，学着一个人听音乐看书写点心情日记。这是个好习惯。

3、如果一个人很难过，找个角落或者在被子里哭一下，不需要别人同情可怜，哭过之后一样开

心生活。

4、如果一个人开始怠慢你，请你离开他。不懂珍惜你的人不要为之不舍，更不必继续付出你的

友情或爱情，到头来受伤的是自己他人不会为之难过。

5、如果可以不抽烟，别抽。如果可以不喝酒，别喝。这是不爱惜自己身体的表现，如果只因一

些人，那么我们别傻了，爱你的人不会让你难过的。

6、伤心的时候找个信任的朋友诉说一下，不要一个人默默承受，这只会会更添寂寞感与忧伤。

7、不开心的时候白天看看蓝天晚上看看夜色，广阔的天空自有属于我们 爱，宁可高傲的发霉不

要低调的恋爱。跟自己说我是最好的。保持一份自信。

8、宁缺毋滥。不要因为寂寞随手抓一个恋人，这对两人都不公平，而且太缺乏责任感。找个知

己不要是恋人。

9、记住你喜欢的人的生日，包括你的家人，当然，还有自己。生日没有人送礼物也无所谓，你

可以买精美的礼物，送给妈妈和爸爸。

10、闲下来的时候,放一段柔情音乐，翻阅几页好书，然后睡个懒觉，快哉。心情不好的时候,也可以睡一觉。

11、从现在开始，聪明一点，不要问别人想不想你？爱不爱你？若是要想你或者爱你自然会对你

说，但是从你的嘴里说出来，别人会很骄傲和不在乎你。

12、不要太在意一些人太在乎一些事，顺其自然以最佳心态面对，因为这世界就是这么不公平往

往在最在乎的事物面前我们最没有价值。

13、不要为了任何人任何事折磨自己。比如不吃饭、哭泣、自闭、抑郁，这些都是傻瓜才做的

事。当然，偶尔傻一下有必要，人生不必时时聪明。

14、任何情况下，背后不说他人是非。如果一定要你说，说好话。多个朋友是好事，即使不是很

要好的，总比因为自己说话不慎重不思考而多一个敌人好得多。

15、允许偶尔看肥皂剧，但不可成为依赖。允许偶尔披头散发，但要注重场合。允许偶尔骂脏

话，但只限在老友面前或者独自一人时，记得说过后要忘掉那些让你难过的事。

16、一定要有几个异性朋友，没有非分之想.就是关键时候,帮你出出主意的好友。

17、学会承受痛苦自己调整心态。有些话，适合烂在心里，有些痛苦，适合无声无息的忘记。当

经历过，你成长了，自己知道就好。很多改变，不需要你自己说，别人会看得到

。

18、能不和人争吵尽量避免。一个发怒的人是很恐怖的，会因控制不了情绪变成疯子。忍耐然后

思索问题的根源最后平静心态解决它 。

19、不管和谁有了矛盾和别扭，解决的时间不要超过24小时。否则麻烦会更多。在可以接受的范

围内，先道歉。让自己做做坏人不是件真的坏事。

生活可以很复杂以可以很简单，我们不要总是活在忧伤和痛苦之中，爱自己多一点！不为一些不

值得的事物而觉得生活总是那么的痛苦无助，人生的方向盘掌握在我们自己手里，有一天阳光大道等着我们走，放开自己，高傲的活着，只要自己幸福开心的，痛苦过去的伤就让他随风而去吧....告诉世界我们属于现在而不是过去！

Why to Delete a Facebook Account

Facebook introduced me to world of internet social networking. I was in an orchestral board meeting and I mentioned "the rolodex." I got real laughter. "You use a rolodex?" I was bewildered. I had not heard that rolodex was out. "People use facebook now." Well, I didn't know that facebook had replaced the rolodex, but the one telling me was a high level manager in a large Bay Area company. I figured he must be right. "Rolodex" was truly funny to several people in that meeting.

I had joined facebook without really thinking about what I was doing. Sometimes I make picks for the games of the NCAA basketball tournament. I decided to make them on the CBS sportsline website. I liked the way that my choices looked in their proper place on the bracket on the computer screen. To use their bracket I had to join this "facebook" thing I had vaguely heard of. This was several years ago. After I signed up, I started getting requests in my email box, asking me to be a friend. I always said, "no," and deleted them. I hadn't even looked at my facebook site. About six months ago, I decided to become more active at facebook because it was something my son was going to be involved with and I wanted him to have accountability.

I learned a little about facebook. There were many aspects about it that I never liked. I was always uncomfortable there. Everyone in our family has now deleted his facebook account. I'm going to tell my problems with facebook. This will give someone reasons why to delete a facebook account. I'm not expecting that any one of these reasons will be enough to persuade someone to drop it like I did, but all of them combined should at least get you thinking. Once I deleted my account, I have not only not missed it, but it has been wonderful to lose it.

1. Facebook hinders scriptural values.

Facebook wasn't around when David Wells wrote No Place for Truth, but if it was, I think he would have written about it in that book.

Having turned inward in a search for meaning, we turn outward in a search for direction, scanning others for the social signals they emit regarding what is in and what is out, what is desirable and what is not. . . . This person is oriented not to inner values but to other people. It is in the peer group that acceptance is found and outcasts are named. . . . Where once people took pride in accomplishments and in their character, [they] think only of how they stand with others. . . . Once people worked to achieve tangible ends, to accomplish things. Now, such accomplishments are of far less significance than one's "image." Once people worked; now they manipulate. Once people sweated; now they seduce. Once people wished to be respected, to have their accomplishments recognized; now they wish to be envied, regardless of whether they are envied for anything they have actually accomplished.

This characteristic of modernity does not orient itself toward God, but toward people. It influences away from judging based on scriptural values and toward judging based upon a societal norm.

2. Facebook alters the biblical understanding of friendship.

To be a friend at facebook, just click. Normally I'm careful with whom I choose as friends. I might be able to be a friend to someone, but someone can't be a friend to me without fulfilling certain characteristics. James tells us (4:4) that friendship with the world is enmity with God. I can't have enmity with God, so I can restrain myself in my choice of friends. I'm to have no company with certain people and mark and avoid others. People in your "friends" list at facebook might be people that would never join my church. We don't believe or practice the same. I don't want to call them my friends. In so doing, I believe I'm just dumbing down what the Bible says about a friend. Here's something else that Dr. Carl Trueman said about it:

The way of connecting with people on Facebook is, apparently, to `friend' somebody. That the noun has become a verb is scarcely cause for concern; but the cheapening of the word surely is. Simply to be linked to someone on the internet is not true friendship; yet the use of the word creates the image that such is the case, or at least blurs the difference between casual internet acquaintance and somebody for whom one might have real affinity, affection, and concern. . . . Further, as the language of friendship is hijacked and cheapened by these internet social networks, this cheapening itself is part and parcel of a redefining of intimacy based upon the erosion of the boundaries between the public and private.

3. Facebook sets wicked things before your eyes.

I can't control the content of what I look at on my facebook page. I not only look at things I don't want to see, but I invite others to look at them when they look at my facebook page. Pictures, advertisements, and statements show up that I don't want to see or have others see either.

4. Facebook causes people to stumble.

I might be able to handle some of what my "friends" believe and practice, but not everyone can. I'd rather not introduce people to other people that I'd rather they didn't meet.

5. Facebook hinders real discernment.

If you were to judge each of your friends based upon a scriptural standard, you would probably lose a large number of them. But you don't. Why? You want to be sociable. It encourages you to make decisions based upon how you feel instead of what the Bible says.

6. Facebook wastes time.

I know you could argue with me on this one by pointing out other ways I waste time. You may think that I'm doing that by writing this blog. Fine. I think it's different but I'm not going to take the time to defend my blog writing right now. Here's how facebook uniquely wastes time. You open yourself up to social activity that you wouldn't choose as a good use of your minutes. You have a friend who isn't much of a friend. That friend writes on your wall. Now what do you have to do? You have to write something back to him. Don't you want to keep your choices about communication under control? You have created new things to take away time from something productive. If you have facebook, you've got to maintain it. Is it worth maintaining?

7. Facebook encourages busybodying.

I've had people ask to be my friend whom I know don't care about me. I know they don't really want to be my friend. What is it that people want? They want to find out what you're doing. I'm not ashamed of what I'm doing, but I believe that this kind of voyeurism fits the biblical criteria of the busybody. It influences others toward being one. "Why did so and so become his friend and not mine?" "I wonder why he has so many friends or who those people are."

8. Facebook hinders real relationships.

Do you think that a real relationship is sitting in front of a computer screen at 11:00 at night? When you could be talking to a real person either in person or by phone, you are constructing your facebook persona.

9. Facebook doesn't like bold, biblical Christianity.

Watch your "friends" list shrink when you confront people about something sinful on their wall, in a photo, or in a comment. Facebook isn't designed for confrontational Christianity, the kind we see Jesus do in the Bible. Typical facebook brings up something essentially secular, earthly, or temporal. You then interact on the same level, training yourself to do more of it. It is a bastion of compromise.

10. Facebook redefines biblical community.

In a real community people do things for each other. Facebook isn't about doing anything to help anyone. I'm not saying that nothing can be done, but it doesn't encourage that. It encourages a fake community. You can join a cause, but what does the cause really do? When you're asked to join a cause, for instance, against internet pornography. That is good. That's a wonderful thing to be against. I'm even for being in a group that is against it. It might even make me think more about being against it. But how are you helping get rid of pornography? What you could do is talk to someone that has an immodest picture up and ask him to take it down. And I really am part of a group that is already against it---my church.

11. Facebook offers way too much acceptance.

Much of what is on facebook should be rejected. However, facebook is all about affirming. You affirm people that really need confrontation. Since very often you can't really know the person you're talking to, you could easily be reaffirming someone with a lukewarm, worldly brand of Christianity that isn't honoring to Christ.

12. Facebook is too public.

Yes, too public. What do I mean? It offers people an opportunity to snoop around and get information. I recognize that you have means on facebook to control that, but it still is a place for trolling perverts. I don't want to be on the same playing field with them or encourage others to be there with me....and him.

13. Facebook preys on fleshly tendencies of man's nature.

Facebook makes you think too much about yourself. Your status shouldn't matter. Someone shouldn't have to return a comment just because you've made one. Facebook fits the narcissism of our day in which men have become lovers of their own selves. What difference does it make how many friends you have as long as you have the friend of sinners Himself, the Lord Jesus.

14. Facebook breaks down decent language.

You can talk right on facebook, but it doesn't encourage it. What it encourages is drivel. We should want to elevate one another, to bring up the level of discourse. That doesn't occur when these abbreviations and slang are used. Young people even feel pressured to bow to talking like this. It attacks spelling, grammar, syntax, and cogent thought. It's lazy speech and many times gutter language.

15. Facebook spawns fraudulence and hypocrisy.

You don't have to be who you are on facebook. You can create a whole different persona of yourself that is a lie. It spawns this kind of activity. Here's what Trueman wrote on this:

On Facebook, I can be anybody I want to be: an eighteen year old Californian with a six-pack, good teeth, a sun tan and a pilot's license; or even a 25 year old blonde beauty queen from North Carolina with a degree in astrophysics. I can become the ultimate in self-created beings - a factor which, I am sure, also partially explains the massive, if little noted, popularity of role-playing video games in the modern world. In virtual world, be it Facebook or the undersea city portrayed in Bioshock, I can be anyone I choose to be. I am the Creator; or at least, I have the potential to think I am.

Even if you sort of know who you're talking to, the person can take advantage of the anonymity of it.

16. Facebook tempts toward infidelity.

I've seen married women talking to younger men on facebook, legitimizing this kind of relationship and giving a false boost to the boy's ego. Her picture might be the most inviting, even a little risque, putting thoughts in his mind that he shouldn't have. Men like to hear someone boast on them, and perhaps they're not getting enough of that at home. These places and others stimulate that kind of activity. Men and women mix in unhealthy ways that would be discouraged in a different setting. Her husband may not be talking to her like she is talked to. She doesn't have to work at it. She can just go to her facebook to get what she needs.

17. Facebook makes you a consumer in a day when we need more producers.

Facebook is a company. They sell ads. They make money off of you. You may not buy anything, but you are another statistic for them to use to sell ads. In other words, facebook is using you. You may think that you are using facebook, but I would say that the owners think otherwise, especially as they laugh all the way to the bank.

18. Facebook is an easy temptation when you need to be getting something done---really done.

You need to write. Go to facebook instead. Homework not done. Gotta do facebook. Need to memorize some Scripture. Facebook is there. Haven't exercised. Oh well, let's facebook. Trueman again writes:

Well, the virtual world is new but it is here to stay; and it will no doubt continue to shape human behavior and self-understanding. We cannot ignore it but neither should we simply allow it to dictate to us who we are and how we think. Thus, we must teach people by precept and example that real life is lived primarily in real time in real places by real bodies. Pale and pimply bloggers who spend most of their spare time onanistically opining about themselves and their issues and in befriending pals made up of pixels are not living life to the full; nor are those whose lives revolve around videogames; rather they are human amoebas, subsisting in a bizarre non-world which involves no risk to themselves, no giving of themselves to others, no true vulnerability, no commitment, no self-sacrifice, no real meaning or value. To borrow a phrase from Thoreau, the tragedy of such is that, when they come to die, they may well discover that they have never actually lived.

For myself, I rejoice that I grew up before the web and the videogame supplanted the real world of real friendships, real discussions, real lives. I did not spend my youth growing obese and developing Vitamin D deficiency in front of an illuminated screen, living my life through the medium of pixels.

19. Facebook causes more facebook.

Very few people could handle facebook in a scriptural manner. It offers so many temptations. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.

泪了～

爱情只属于俊男美女么？

这次真的是泪了～

我以为我很坚强，但是当我知道事情的真相的时候，心很痛～

我以为他也喜欢我，所以才会对我好～

原来真的是我自作多情～

如果不是喜欢我，为什么要对我那么好?

你以为对每个人好就是好人的表现吗？

不是这样的，你会让人误会的～

我很幸苦，很受伤，又不可以让好朋友知道，免得她觉得难过～

他喜欢上你不是你的错，只是我真的觉得很难过很难过～

好想回家，只有家人不会嫌弃我～

我就是我，为什么我找不到喜欢我的人？

我真的那么不漂亮吗？我真的不吸引人吗？我的条件真的那么差吗？

找不到自信，找不到～

其实也不可以怪别人，是我自己傻～

傻女，不是每个对你好的人你就要喜欢他～

你要学习把自己的心收好，不要轻易把心给出去～

当心碎的时候，只会让自己很难过很难过～

我需要时间康复～我需要时间冷静～真的很难过，真的真的很难过～

恩恩

2010年3月2日

1700